Technically, I've already met my fiancee's parents. It was the first thing I made sure to do during our relationship's infancy to show that I was serious and in it for the long run (but honestly, who would've known back then that we'd be together this long-- even longer, right?).
But meeting her parents and asking them for their precious daughter's hand in marriage are two different things. What made things a tad bit more complicated was that her father's living overseas while her old-school conservative mother pretty much runs their town like an O.G.
She's not into politics, but I've always told my fiancee that whenever her ma felt like running for a local seat, she'd win via landslide all day. That's how recognized and respected she is in her neighborhood.
It was just another regular Saturday, and I had two openings to formally inform/ ask for her daughter's hand in marriage.
We were driving to my fiancee's father's side at Norzagaray, which is a different side of the Bulacan area and an NLEX-drive away from their home of Calumpit. We stopped at NLEX Petron for lunch and my would be wife kept signaling that it was the right time to break the news to her mom and brother.
Honestly, I didn't feel like telling them then and there. What if they didn't approve? How awkward would the drive to Norzagaray and back home be? Also, if her ma didn't approve, she's bound to tell their relatives and hand us a sermon about how "we're still young" and so on-- the things that old people say to keep the next generation from marrying haha.
I sensed that my fiancee wasn't all too pleased with it, but I felt that as a man, it should be me taking charge and breaking the news when I saw fit.
We went to Norzagaray and drove home without any setbacks, it was late, I was tired, so we all went to sleep.
The following day we went to SM Pampanga (where a 13 year old boy would shoot his 16 year old lover a few weeks later in what could very well be Henry Sy's PR nightmare) with her brother. This is where we broke the news. Well, she did. I was trying to get ready, but she beat me to it. Her brother was okay with it, and we were all happy-relieved. He commented that we're at the right age anyway, and we've been together for 7 years so if anything, our marriage would've been a formality.
As soon as we came home to their house, my fiancee was glowing like a little girl with a big secret. Come nighttime, after dinner, that's when I decided to have "the talk" with her mom.
I was scared. I won't lie. I was nervous and kind of preparing myself for an hour-long sermon. But her mom just gave me a few reminders, told me that her daughter could be a handful at times (which we both laughed at) and gave me her blessing. My fiancee at the time, was running up and down the stairs giddy-nervous I guess. Whatever, she probably lit a cigarette or two out of anxiety.
I definitely could've used a smoke.
With her dad, I called him overseas one morning to ask for his blessings. It was a conversation between two men, and I was happy and honored to have won his trust. When he left for the States a couple of years ago, I promised him that I would take care of his daughter and would never hurt her. I told him that I continue to honor that promise, and if he wanted to, would wait for him to return before we push through with the church wedding (keyword: church, so he could walk her down the aisle).
My fiancee reminded me of an old tradition called "pamamanhikan." I said we'll do it her way, but didn't have the time because she had to leave the following week. It wouldn't be that hard anyway, since my mom's the only relative I want to bring along. She said that I should also bring my dad along, but I didn't want any drama. This was our wedding, our special thing, not my mom or dad's.
She respected that, and when she comes home, I'll have 10 sacks of rice, 10 pigs, 50 chickens and cases of beer ready. Haha. No, seriously, I have no idea what people do during/ for "pamamanhikan."
Step 3: The Wedding Planner
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